Into the Devil's Arms
by thefinchelshipper
Summary: AU Rachel Berry is a young Jewish girl growing up in Germany under the reign of one Adolf Hitler. Finn Hudson is just a small town boy trying to figure out how to save her from the inevitable. Rated M for Graphic Material and Subject Matter
1. Chapter 1

**Well hello there lovely readers! I have come up with a new story idea. This is actually something I've been wanting to write about for a while now.  
It's Holocaust inspired. I know this may be a tricky subject to write about, and please do voice any and all concerns you have. This is a very mature read, because I do my research on the Holocaust. My family was involved in the Holocaust as well, them being from Czechoslovakia and all. Please review and read. Also, any historical facts that I may have gotten wrong, feel free to correct me. I try to research enough to get my facts right. :) Thanks!**

* * *

She remembers the day it happened. It was the middle of June, 1937. She remembers the sound of the shot. Glancing out the window to see the commotion. Seeing the red stain blossom across her father's chest. Her mother running. Screaming. Sobbing. She remembers feeling like her whole world was gone; her perfect life was breaking and crashing into the sea. She knows now that this event in her life was only a small fraction of the terror that was to come. Now, she knows things will get worse. It is inevitable, what with her being who she is.

Rachel remembers that a few weeks after the shooting, she received a letter. It was a condolence letter, something she had gotten used to in the past weeks, but this one was different. The return address was in Lima, Ohio. She knew that was a state in the United States. Her father had told her about his time there once, in a big steel mill. He had worked with a man whom he grew close with. Rachel soon realized that the letter she held was from that man's son, Finn Hudson.

And that one letter started it all.

She pulled herself out of her memories and rifled through her desk drawer until she found it. The first letter he'd sent. She smiled a little as she opened it, her eyes scanning over the messy scrawl of his handwriting. Luckily, she understood the English well enough. Her father had taught her all he knew. She was able to communicate well with Finn.

* * *

_Dear Miss Berry,_

_I'm hoping this letter will not seem odd for you to get. While I know you must be getting many condolence letters, and surely it is beginning to seem old to you, I simply want to tell you how sorry I am for your loss. My name is Finn Hudson. My father is Christopher Hudson, a very close friend of your father's. We are around the same age, I think. Fourteen or fifteen, I guess? I know you must be going through a very hard time right now. I will not try to sympathize with you, though. I can only imagine the pain you must feel in your heart. Your mother wrote my father to explain the situation to him, and in turn, he explained it to me. I feel that no one should be persecuted on behalf of their beliefs. I know that your father was a good man, or at least that is what my father has always told me. He died a brave man, still a strong believer in his own faith. I understand this is a hard time for you and your mother, but I know that you are strong. I have never met you or spoken to you, but I feel in my heart that you will make it through. If this letter is strange to you, I apologize. I am just a simple boy from Ohio hoping to console you in the slightest bit. I do not expect a return letter, but if you so wish to send one, I will be grateful. _

_Wishing You the Best,_

_Finn Christopher Hudson_

_February 17, 1938_

* * *

Rachel grinned again as she read over the letter once more. Even when he didn't know her, he was kind. He acted as if they'd known each other forever, and now, after the years of writing each other, she felt that way as well.

After placing the letter securely back in it's home in the drawer, Rachel turned to the new letter resting on her writing desk. She opened it up, then began to read.

* * *

_Dearest Rachel,_

_First of all, I want to thank you for the photograph you sent. Now I can finally see who this wonderful girl is that I've been writing! And my suspicions were confirmed. You are truly gorgeous. I always felt that you had a smile that lit up the world. Even from this photograph, I can feel it's warmth. I can feel you radiating out from this image. _

_In other news, I continue to pray for your safety daily. I do not know much about the war, except the rumors going around. I assume you know many of them yourself, but I encourage you to protect yourself. I already love you too much to lose you. If I could, I would be in Germany tonight to rescue you from the cruel monsters who try to hurt you. You would never have to spend another long night in a bar, letting your lovely voice fill the room until all hours of the morning. You deserve so much better than that. I know that someday you will become a star with that voice of yours. You say it's not that good, but I know in my heart you're amazing. _

_I want to rescue you from the evil that is around you. I will rescue you, Rachel. We will be together someday. You've just got to stay strong for me. _

_All My Love,_

_Finn_

_March 3, 1941_

* * *

Rachel sighed sweetly as she read over the letter. Her heart swelled with joy when she learned that he thought she was beautiful. She never thought that about herself. Her nose set her apart. In Germany, that was a bad thing. It may as well have been a sign over her stating 'I'm a Jew. Kill me.'

She sighed and pulled out a fresh sheet of stationery, then set out a pot of ink and a pen. She had a typewriter, of course, but she preferred the handwritten letters. They held more emotion. More personality and love, she thought.

* * *

_My Dear Finn,_

_You have no idea the amount of joy I feel when I read that you think I am beautiful. I am so glad you like the pictures, and I will surely send more when I can. You are handsome as well. I never thought a man as lovely as you would find a girl like me attractive. But I struck gold, you see. You are not only handsome, but also caring and compassionate. _

_It saddens me to know that you are worried for my safety. You should be concerned with other things, Finn. I shall be fine. I know that God will protect me, and what is meant to happen will happen. I want to see you so badly it hurts. I simply must get out of Germany, Finn. I long to touch you, to feel your smooth skin. When this wretched war is over, I will come to America with my mother. We will settle in lovely Ohio, and will marry you. _

_Love,  
Rachel_

_March 20, 1941_

* * *

Weeks passed. No letter from Finn had arrived. The spring of 1941 had come and gone, and the summer had set in. The heat was intense, to say the least.

Rachel paced around her bedroom, trying to drown out the sounds of the busy Berlin street below. Her windows were open wide because it was simply too hot to keep them closed.  
She was slightly worried, not about Finn, but about her letters. Surely he had sent one...But could it be that the Gestapo was keeping all letters from reaching her? That was a possibility, for sure.

She sighed and ran her fingers through her long, brown mane. Maybe he hadn't replied? Perhaps he thought it too risky to continue sending letters. Or perhaps he just didn't want to talk to her anymore? Perhaps he believed the stereotypes and propaganda posed against the Jews of Germany and all of Europe. Perhaps.

Rachel had barely sat down at her desk before she heard yelling down in the streets. She stood quickly and looked out one of her windows only to see the Gestapo rounding people up, kicking them, hitting them, and in some cases, shooting them. Rachel's heart started to race. No, this wasn't happening now. This couldn't be happening now.

She heard feet race up the stairs and was relieved to see only her mother standing in her doorway.

"Rachel, come now. Pack a bag. Quickly, child. We haven't got much time. Pack clothing, warm clothing especially. Wear your heavy woolen coat as well."

"But mother, it's the middle of Summer!" Rachel protested, carefully retrieving the large leather suitcase from her closet.

"Do not argue. Do as I say." her mother replied gravely. "We have no idea how long we will be gone."

Rachel nodded once and began packing every article of clothing she could inside her suitcase. She put a few valuables in as well - money, photographs, jewelry- and closed her suitcase up. Reluctantly, she pulled her heavy winter coat around her shoulders. She remembered something though.

Rachel reached into her desk drawer and pulled out the letters from Finn. She took his single photograph out and placed it in her pocket, holding it securely in her hand.

As soon as she'd finished packing, there came a commotion from downstairs. She glanced out the window quickly to see that the Gestapo was indeed at the front door of her home. She then heard heavy boots on the stairs. Then she saw them.

They had the devil's eyes. They were evil.

One man, a very large blonde-haired, blue-eyed man, grabbed her by her arm and threw her to the door. She held her suitcase tightly in her hand, trying to catch her balance.

"Out! Now! Hurry, get out!" He barked at her, pushing her a little. The other Gestapo officers yelled at her as well, pushing her hurriedly down the stairs. She soon met up with her mother and held onto her hand tightly.

"Mother, what's happening? Please tell me what's happening? It can't be what I think it is.." She asked worriedly.

"Rachel, you listen to them. Do not cause a panic. Simply do as they say and follow orders. We are going away for a while.

Once they were successfully prodded outside, Rachel took one last glance at her home. The large home she'd grown up in. The dark brick always felt so protective. The dark cherry wood flooring and accents had always felt so warm to her. She had always felt as though this home would protect her from all the bad things in the world. She was wrong.

Outside, there was panic and chaos. Adults yelled and thrashed, children screamed. Rachel and her mother were packed into large trucks, along with many other people. She huddled close to her mother, seeking her warmth. She felt so cold, even in the extreme heat of a Berlin summer. Rachel's heart raced. She only wanted to leave. To go to America and be with Finn. He would protect her. But he couldn't do that here. Because he wasn't here. He wouldn't be here to protect her.

Her thumb and forefinger found the photograph in her pocket and rubbed along the edges of the square. She felt soothed by this. He wasn't physically here, but as long as she had that photograph, she knew she'd be okay.

Perhaps they were simply being relocated. She'd heard of other cities having provided segregated areas of the city for Jews. While she didn't want that, Rachel knew it was better than the rumors she'd been hearing about some of the Jews in Germany. Perhaps they would be home in a few days? She hoped so.

She began to hum quietly to herself. It was a good stress reliever for her.

Rachel closed her eyes and her world melted away, if only for a little while.

Later, she awoke, rather startled. Her back was stiff from the long ride and the sunlight burned her eyes when they were finally let off of the truck. She looked around after having gotten adjusted to the light and discovered that there had to have been thousands of Jews here in this spot, which seemed to be nowhere. It was desolate, except for train tracks and a large platform on which several SS Officers stood. They were on one side of the tracks. The other side held a forrest; dark and creepy to say the least.

Rachel watched as one by one, Gestapo picked out several people; the elderly and sick, and pushed them aside in their own group. After all had been picked through, the large group of the elderly and sick were escorted over the tracks and into the forrest.

After what seemed like a while, shots rang out in the air, causing complete silence among the crowd. Birds flew out of the forrest. Rachel immediately knew what had happened. Those people wouldn't come back.

She bit her lip gently and sat on the ground, taking the small photograph of Finn out of her pocket and looking at it. She gazed into his eyes and she could feel herself being transported to another time and place; one where she and Finn were together and none of these atrocities were happening.

But then she looked up, and she realized she was in the middle of it all. There was no way she would get out.

And suddenly, she was confused as she saw the cattle cars coming into view. What could those be for? Surely not us, she thought. But the train came to a screeching halt and once the first car was opened, and she saw the emptiness inside of it, she knew what it was for.

"Oh mother." She whispered, a tear spilling from her eye. It fell onto the picture she held in her hand. She wiped it quickly, then sent a silent prayer to God, asking, no, begging for help. Finn would protect her. He had to, right?


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks y'all so much for the reviews and support for this story. I am really looking forward to writing more of it. Now, there's not much Finn featured yet, but the next chapter will have a little bit of Finn :) But yeah, I'm trying to update it ALOT before I have to go back to school..because yall know is blocked from my school's internet :( Which i'm so sad about. But anyway, review and read!**

* * *

Her heart beat hard and fast in her chest as she watched a few of the SS Officers descend from the platform next to the train.

"_Oh God, no. What is this?" _she thought. Rachel bit her lip and held her mother's hand tightly. She had to stay with her mother. That was her number one priority.

There were only two SS Officers left on the platform, and one raised his arm high into the air. The crowd fell silent. Deathly silent. Her heart was beating so hard, and Rachel felt as if everyone could hear it in this eerie silence. Then, the officer spoke.

"Achtung! (_attention_)" He yelled out, glaring at each person in the immense crowd. Everyone immediately focused on him. "You are being transported to the east, to work. There are jobs there. Housing and food are plentiful. You are not going to be harmed." He said, faking a smile on his face. "You will all be safer there. Now, cooperate and get on the trains." He barked, nodding at the SS Officers in the crowd.

They stared sorting people into large groups of maybe 120 people per group. Then, those groups were practically shoved into the cars.

Rachel and her mother were sorted next. She shivered as she felt the large hand of an officer on her shoulder, shoving her forward. She held her suitcase tightly and helped her mother into the train. It was wooden, and smelled of sick and urine. The filth and grime covered every inch of the car, and Rachel hated to have to sit down in that.

Reluctantly, she sat on top of her suitcase in one corner. Her mother sat next to her, silent as ever, just holding tight to Rachel's hand. Once the car was successfully packed enough, Rachel looked around her. She barely had enough room to breathe there were so many people in the car. And the air was stifling. It was burning. Itching. Everything was black and she couldn't see. And in that moment, she just wanted to cry. Then, she remembered what the officer had said. _Better housing. Food is plentiful in the east. You'll have work. _She sighed and closed her eyes, trying to focus on the life ahead of her. Simply make it through the misery, then you'll find happiness.

To her right was a small child, a little girl, no more than 5 or 6 years old. Rachel smiled faintly at her. She clutched a tiny, ragged bear in one hand, and her thumb was firmly planted in her mouth. She had tear stains on her cheeks, and her sandy blonde hair was a mess.

Rachel frowned slightly when she realized that the small girl was alone. No one seemed to be caring for her.

"Hello there." she told the girl, mustering a small smile. "My name's Rachel. What's your name?"

"Hanna." She replied quietly. The tiny child looked up at Rachel with large brown eyes, similar to her own eyes.

Rachel grinned at her. "That's a pretty name. How about your bear? Does he have a name?"

"His name is Mr. Bear." Hanna told her, glancing back down at her bear, then back at Rachel.

"That's a lovely name, Hanna." She paused for a moment. "If you don't mind my asking, where is your mommy or daddy?"

Hanna's forehead creased, forming deep lines, and Rachel could see as her eyes filled with tears. "Mommy got taken into the woods. Daddy has been gone for a few weeks now."

Rachel's heart broke just then for Hanna. She _was_ all alone. Rachel now had another responsibility. She couldn't just let this child be alone. She had to take care of her. Chances were, she'd never see her parents again. "W-Well, I'm sure they're both doing just fine and they cannot wait to see you. In the meantime, you can be my new friend. Would you like to be my friend?"

She saw as the girl's face lit up a little bit, and the corners of her mouth turned upward into a smile. "Yes. I've never had many friends before."

"Well, now you've got me. You won't be alone anymore." Rachel told her, smiling. "How about you lay your head right here in my lap and try to take a nap?"

Hanna nodded and scooted closer to Rachel, then laid her tiny head in Rachel's lap. Her eyes closed, and in no time she was fast asleep.

Rachel looked down at Hanna and sighed. She was already alone in the world. Her parents gone. Probably never to come back. But she had Rachel. And while Rachel could never be her mother, she was going to protect her. It was the motherly instinct inside of her. She sighed and laid her head back on the hard wood of the car. To her left was another wall. Luckily, she'd gotten a corner to sit in. There were a few cracks, letting in a little light and fresh air, but not much.

And there they sat. All day. The heat was intense, especially with so many bodies packed into one confined space. Children cried and people were getting sick. The train hadn't even started moving yet and this was already happening.

Finally, after what seemed like days, the train began to screech along the tracks. It was night out, she suspected, because it had cooled off substantially inside the car. The smell was still horrific though. Hanna still slept soundly in Rachel's lap.

Rachel found the small square photograph in her pocket and held it. She would've looked at it, but seeing as it was pitch black in the car now, she wouldn't be able to see it. She sighed and laid her head on her mother's shoulder, glad to finally be moving.

A few hours later, Rachel discovered that a moving train was no better than a non moving train. She hadn't thought about the fact that many people get motion sickness. Now, the train car smelled of sick even more. They had a communal bucket, but it was horribly filthy. People got sick left and right, not to mention the need to relieve oneself. She felt absolutely humiliated. Like a pig. Vermin. No better than an animal.

She hadn't properly let herself cry either, up until this point. Little Hanna had woken up, feeling ill and threw up just near Rachel. Rachel couldn't get angry though, because Hanna couldn't help herself. She was just a child. So now, Rachel consoled a crying Hanna, rubbing her back slowly and holding her in her arms. Rachel sniffled a little and finally let a few salty tears fall from her eyes. They burned her dirty cheeks. She finally let herself go and simply sobbed. How had her life turned into this? Better yet, _why_? What had she done to deserve this?

And she didn't know then that it would only get worse from there.

Hours passed. She was in and out of sleep, as were Hanna and her mother. She felt hot and cold all at the same time. Perhaps she was ill too. She didn't particularly care.  
All she could focus on was making it out of this train. She needed to get out; to see sunlight again, to breathe fresh air.

But as the hours kept going, she felt as though she'd never get out of the train. Would she be stuck here forever? Hopefully not. But perhaps this was their preferred method of killing. Simply exhaust them to the point of death. Perhaps.

She sighed and looked up at her mother. "Mother, how long have we been in here?" She asked, frowning a little.

"I'd say a little over two days. Maybe. There is no telling how long they will keep us on here." She replied to her daughter, looking into Rachel's frightened eyes. She glanced down at Hanna, who had fallen asleep again. "You are a kind girl, Rachel. I have always admired your motherly qualities." She let out a long sigh. "Poor child. These devils know what they do. They see it. How could anyone do this? Intentionally hurt someone?"

Rachel frowned sadly down at Hanna and stroked her hair softly. In only two short days she felt closer to this small girl than she'd ever felt to anyone. She was going to protect her with every ounce of strength in her body. "We'll get through this. After we do, we're going to America."

Her mother smiled faintly and nodded. "Yes." She said simply, laying her head back and closing her eyes. "We will do that."

Rachel sighed contently and looked around the car, trying to make out the peoples' faces in the darkness. Light had begun to stream in through the cracks in the wood, so it was easier to tell what people looked like. Most were dirty and sick looking. Some were sleeping. Though she couldn't distinguish between just sleeping and...well..dead. _Everyone_ had the exhausted look on their face, the one that simply said, _I want to leave this place. I just want to be out of here. Anywhere is better than here._  
She then thought about her own appearance. She knew she probably looked terrible. Her hair was tangled, her body sweaty and grimy.

* * *

Two more days, they rode like that. It was miserable, to say the least. No food, no water. Several more people had died in their train car alone. Hanna's tiny body couldn't take it. She threw up many times, but near the end, there was nothing left in her stomach. It was just dry heaving. Rachel simply held her close, determined that she would make it through this death ride.

At the end of the fourth day, the train began to slow. Then, it lurched to a stop. There it sat throughout the night. It was still terrible, but at least the train had stopped moving.

* * *

Then, in the early hours of the morning, the door to the train car slid open, letting in the bright light. It made Rachel's eyes burn a little.

"Out! Out! Everyone out! Leave the dead inside and get out quickly." She heard the officers yell. She stood on wobbly legs, and finally made her way outside the car, still clutching her suitcase in one hand and Hanna's hand in the other hand. Her mother followed behind her. Hanna looked around her, clearly frightened. She held Rachel's hand so tightly with her own that Rachel felt like her hand would fall off.

"Everything's alright, Hanna. We'll be okay now. I promise." Rachel told Hanna, looking down at the child. "We're okay."

They walked along the tracks until they were stopped by several guards. They were being sorted.

"Ill people to the left! Others to the right!" They screamed at her. Luckily, they were all sorted to the right of the platform. They finally came upon a large building labeled 'Registration'. They were told to leave all belongings outside the building in the grass. They'd be back to get them after registering.

So they were shuffled inside the large, wooden building. People were everywhere. But all in single file lines. It was extremely orderly. Not something she'd expected.

Rachel looked around in confusion. She didn't want to be here, 'registering'. It seemed frightening. But she had to do it.

After giving her name, birthday, and other important information, she came upon a new desk.

"Is she your daughter?" A woman asked Rachel. The woman was wearing a striped uniform. Her face sagged. She looked exhausted. Rachel assumed she was living here. She certainly wasn't a guard of any sort. The woman cleared her throat and motioned to Hanna. "If she's not related to you, then she'll have to go back to the left line. We can't have unattended children here."

Rachel quickly looked to her mother, then at Hanna. "Y-Yes, she's my daughter." She told the woman. She couldn't let Hanna be alone. There was no telling where that left line led to. "Her name's Hanna Berry."

"Next table then." The woman said. She lacked emotion. She was nearly a robot.

Rachel held Hanna's hand in hers as they walked along. There was a similar woman at the next table. "Arm." She told Rachel, reaching out her hand. Rachel frowned a little but handed her arm over. The woman began scratching something into Rachel's left arm. It was painful, but she didn't let it show on her face. Next, she did it to Rachel's mother. And finally, Hanna. The child cried, but Rachel soothed her and held her close. Once it was over, they were shooed to another table.

This one...This table was dreadful.

Rachel, her mother, and Hanna were seated. She watched as her brown hair was forcibly cut from her head. Her beautiful brown curls fell to the floor in a heap. She felt humiliated. They were treated like cattle. Sheep. Just vermin. They were not human, in the eyes of the enemy. Rachel knew what this was. It was Nazi terror. This was inhumane. But they themselves were inhumane.

She stood once more, shaking a little, and felt Hanna's warm, tiny hand grab hers once more. The next table they came upon had stacks of striped uniforms, exactly like the ones the workers were wearing. Rachel was handed one uniform for herself, and one for Hanna. She, Hanna, and her mother were guided into a shower room where they were made to strip and got only five minutes in cold water, without soap, to wash themselves.

After the shower, they dressed in the itchy uniforms and were shown to their barracks. The three of them piled into a bunk and fell into an exhausted, dreamless sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you all for the reviews! I absolutely love learning about this time period in history, so I try so hard to get my facts right. If you have any questions or comments about any historical fact in the story, please ask. And as always, review! I LOVE it when you guys review. It certainly encourages me to post chapters faster... Well, love yall. :)**

* * *

Morning came almost as soon as she'd fallen asleep, it seemed. A horn sounded and suddenly their barracks became alive. Hundreds of people rushed about, hurrying outside. Rachel was confused, but she decided to follow suit for fear that if she didn't, there would be consequences.

And she was right. This was morning roll call. Each person, or _prisoner_, rather, had a specific place. If he or she was not in that place, chances were, they would not live to see another day. Luckily, Hanna was a smart girl and caught on to the system easily. She was only six years old, but over the past few days she had matured years. Rachel thought it sad. A child should be free to be a child, not a forced laborer. But there was nothing she could do.

After roll call came breakfast, or what was _supposedly_ breakfast. It was positively the weakest coffee Rachel had ever drunk in her life, and some sort of potato mush soup, along with a paltry crust of bread.

Rachel, Hanna, and her mother ate their food quickly. It was the first thing they'd eaten in five days. The meager amount of food filled them enough to get through the day, though

After breakfast, they were assigned work.

Rachel and Hanna would be sent to the camp director's house to work as maids. The SS Officer did not think Rachel would be of much help in the factory where Rachel's mother was sent to work. Hanna's tiny fingers would be put to good use polishing silver and cleaning crystal and china. Rachel didn't want to leave her mother alone, though. She had no idea what they might do to her, what they might force her to do.

"M-Mother, I don't want to go without you." Rachel told her mother, frowning deeply. "You have to ask if you can come with us, please."

She shook her head slowly. "I cannot. You will be safe there. Take care of Hanna. I love you."

And with that, the workers, including her mother, were sent to march toward the factory outside the camp until late that evening.

Rachel and Hanna, along with a man who Rachel assumed was to tend to the yard of the home, were led by an SS Guard along a path outside the camp. After a while of walking, they came upon a beautiful brick mansion. It belonged to the camp kommandant, Obersturmbannführer (_similar to lieutenant colonel_) Rudolf Höss, his wife Hedwig Hensel, and their five children. It was a lovely dark cream brick home, rather large, but not too large. It reminded Rachel of her own childhood home; the one she'd just left a few days previous. Her heart ached for a moment. She sighed slowly.

Her attention was then brought to the front door. A man in a clean, dapper SS uniform walked out of the building. The officer near her nodded to him, then motioned to Rachel, Hanna, and the man.

"Yes, they will do. The littlest one will surely come in handy. But they _are_ eyesores, aren't they? Those damn Jews." He sighed. Rachel hated him already. Sure, she wasn't beautiful, but she'd never go as far as to call herself an _eyesore._

"I'll put them straight to work, Obersturmbannführer." The young, blonde SS guard replied. And with that, he began to bark orders at them. Rachel and Hanna were to go inside and begin cleaning. If anything, any one thing, was wrong, they'd be severely punished. The man, who Rachel learned was called Josef. He was assigned to yard work.

Quickly, Rachel pulled Hanna inside the elaborate home of the kommandant and began her cleaning duties. Once they began, the laughter of several children could be heard throughout the house. Then, one by one, four out of the kommandant's five children ran past her and Hanna.

Rachel sighed and pitifully watched as Hanna looked up at them, longing to run and play with children once again. But no, she was here, cleaning up after them. The privileged children of the Nazi elite.

* * *

_-Meanwhile, in Ohio-_

* * *

Finn Hudson sat up in his bed, the chirping of birds in the trees causing him to wake from his sleep. He had a strange feeling inside him.

He slowly got out of the bed and pulled on his clothes for the day, then made his bed up. Finn didn't like the feeling inside him. It felt so wrong.

He tried to ignore it as he scarfed down his breakfast. He had to check the mailbox. Maybe, just maybe, the letter had come today. Perhaps she'd written him back, finally?

He walked the short distance to his mailbox and opened it, then quickly searched through the letters, only to be discouraged when he found that there were none from Rachel. That was extremely odd.

He sighed and sat on his front porch, looking out into his suburban neighborhood. _She's probably just been busy. I'm sure she's alright._ He convinced himself of this. Any thinking otherwise would cause him to panic. He didn't want to panic. She was fine, he knew it.

Finn stood again after a while and walked back inside. He checked his calendar eagerly. Only one week until he was shipped off to basic training. He'd joined the military on his own accord, simply because of Rachel. He needed to help her, and this was the only way he'd be able to. Granted, the chances of him being sent anywhere near where she was were slim to none, but he could try, right?

Finn paced around his kitchen, hands in his pockets, when his father walked in and spotted him.

"Finn, son. I've got something to talk to you about. You might ought to sit down for this."

He did as his father asked, and sat at the kitchen table, looking up at his dad. "Yeah, what is it pop?"

"I received some news yesterday." he said grimly.

"Well, what was it? Come on."

"There have been some, eh, deportations throughout Germany in the past few months. I know a couple of guys in the resistance over there, because of Mr. Berry and all, and they say the rumors are true. The camps do exist.."

Finn shook his head and frowned. "So what are you trying to tell me? Rachel is _not _in a camp, pop. She just hasn't written me back is all."

"No, I'm not saying she is, son. But things are heating up over there. I'm not sure you'll get a letter from her anytime soon. She's probably still at home, but the mail system for Jewish people there has been difficult to use.. Those damn Nazis got everything controlled, you know?"

Finn nodded, sighing a little. "I know, pop."

"Now, she's probably fine. Just might take a while before she's able to mail you back."

He nodded once more. "I know. She's alright, I know she is."

Finn stood, and after saying goodbye to his father, he walked out the front door, toward the center of town. He needed to simply clear his head. Of course Rachel was okay. **She had to be.**

* * *

_-end-_

* * *

Rachel felt like she had been cleaning for hours. It was exhausting, and headache inducing. Though, she had to admit, this was certainly better than being outside all day long. And at least she was with Hanna.

Poor Hanna's hands were red and raw from polishing so much silver. Her hands were the tiniest ones, which meant she could get the insides the cleanest. Not to mention, the children kept staring at her throughout the day, as if she were an alien.

Rachel sighed as she finished mopping the floors. "Done. Finally." She said, wiping a bit of sweat from her brow. Hanna smiled over at Rachel.

"The floors look nice. They're shiny." She said, grinning, as she continued polishing a crystal goblet.

"Why thank you, Hanna. The crystal is looking wonderful as well." Rachel replied, smiling at Hanna.

Suddenly, a small girl, around ten or eleven years of age, burst into the kitchen. "Water, now." She reached her hand out, and Rachel quickly filled a glass for her.

After the girl had drunk half the glass, she looked over Rachel and Hanna quizzically. "You're Jews, aren't you?"

They both nodded slowly. They weren't exactly allowed to talk to anyone in this home, especially the children.

"Are you too stupid to talk or something? My father says all Jews are stupid. That you're uneducated. Is that true?"

Rachel shook her head. Here she was, being made a fool of, by a child.

"I think you look stupid. You haven't any hair. That's quite stupid if you ask me." said the girl. She had long blonde hair of her own. It was braided into two strands, with dark green ribbons tied in bows at the ends. Her eyes were the most clear and pure blue Rachel had ever seen in her life. Her skin was the color of milk, free of blemish and marks. "I bet you had nice hair, before it got chopped off. What are your names? If you know how to say them." She asked, raising an eyebrow.

"My name is Rachel. This is Hanna." She said, looking down at Hanna, who was clearly frightened by the child in front of her.

"Is she stupid?"

"No.. She's just little. She doesn't like to talk to strangers, either."

"I'm not a stranger anymore, am I? My name is Annegret. I'm ten. But just call me Anne, if you like. I like both of you. Even though the little one might be stupid, and you've got an awfully unfortunate nose. And the fact that you're both Jews is a slight bit upsetting. But I suppose I shall talk to you every so often. You'll be the most sophisticated company, anyhow. My older brother, Klaus, is horrible. And then I've got the three younger ones. They're terrors. I should go now, though. If you get caught talking to me, you'll be punished. As will I. So, goodbye."

And with that, the young blonde girl ran off, to who knows where. Rachel simply looked down at Hanna with a slight smile on her face.

"We seem to have made a friend without even trying." She smiled, then got back to work.

A while later, they had both finished and were being escorted back to camp by the same blonde SS Officer as earlier. Rachel felt extremely uncomfortable around this man. He would give her the strangest looks; like the devil staring into your soul.

Once back at camp, they were fed the same food as breakfast and lunch, then sent to roll call.

After roll call ended, Rachel laid in the bunk, Hanna snuggled close to her. She felt oddly comforted by this small girl. She knew she'd done the right thing, taking her in as her own. She needed someone too. So the three of them laid there, trying to sleep on the hard, wooden bunks. Only a thin layer of straw separated them from the wood. The smell of nearly 600 women and children in the barracks filled the air. It was putrefying, but eventually Rachel moved past that and fell asleep only to be woken up to do the same exact thing tomorrow.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you for the reviews! I really am falling in love with this story, and I hope you are too. I really hope I am getting my facts right... I'm doing plenty of research for this story. Also, next chapter will reveal more of Rachel's personality, because I know that right now it doesn't seem like it relates to glee very much, but I promise it will in the future. Also, get ready for some Finn, Noah, and Quinn! :) **

* * *

It was a warm, July evening and Rachel and Hanna had just gotten back from the Kommandant's house. Today had been the same as any other day. It had been three weeks of cleaning, day after day. She hoisted herself up onto their bunk, then pulled Hanna up after. There they sat, eating their dinner slowly and in silence, waiting for Rachel's mother to return from her day of labor.

The food in the camps had slimmed Rachel down severely already. She was quite used to eating hearty meals, three times a day at her home. Now, she was lucky to get what she got twice daily. She had noticed her hands were a slight bit thinner, and her legs had gotten smaller as well. She didn't mind so much about herself. It was Hanna she was worried about. Six year olds were supposed to be healthy and plump, but Hanna was skinny and pale.

Rachel usually gave Hanna her own ration of bread, because Hanna needed it more. Sharing was in her nature. She could not let a child go hungry in front of her eyes, so she did without.

Once Hanna finished her food, she grabbed her dirty little stuffed bear and laid down on the bunk, sucking her thumb gently. Rachel leaned against the brick wall at the back of their bunk and sighed, singing a quiet lullaby to Hanna, as she often did.

* * *

_(Durme Durme, Sephardic Lullaby. Some words may seem Spanish, but this language is Judaeo-Spanish)_

_"Durme, Durme_

_Itziko de Madre_

_Durme, Durme_

_Sin Ansia y Dolor _

_Durme Durme_

_Sin Ansia y Dolor_

_Sienti Yoya_

_Palavrikas de tu Padre_

_Las Palavras_

_de Shema Yisroel_

_Las Palavras_

_de Shema Yisroel_

_Durme Durme_

_Itziko de Madre_

_con Hermosura_

_de Shema Yisroel_

_con Hermosura_

_de Shema Yisroel"_

* * *

She sighed and rubbed the small girl's back. She sang this lullaby to her every night. It was the same one Hanna's own mother had sung her nightly before she was killed.

Hanna was fast asleep now. She looked so peaceful there, on the bed of thin straw and wood. Rachel closed her own eyes and hummed quietly until she was near sleep herself.

Then, without warning, a loud bang startled her awake once more.

"Achtung!" yelled an SS Officer. He paced around the room, glaring at everyone in the bunks. "Children! Any children in this barrack? All children will come with me for required medical purposes."

Rachel frowned slightly at the man. She had seen him around the camp before. He had dark hair and dark eyebrows. His face looked friendly, but she knew he was not. She had heard the stories about him. Josef Mengele was his name. He was one of several camp doctors, but his area of expertise, or interest rather, was children. She wanted Hanna nowhere near this man, but she feared if she did not wake the little girl, that they would both suffer consequences.

And so she shook Hanna gently. Her heart was hurting already. But perhaps he was actually just doing what he said? Medical purposes? Perhaps they were trying to heal the children?

Hanna stirred and sat up, rubbing her eyes gently.

"H-Hanna...You must go with the doctor for a check up. You must go now." Rachel told her, frowning slightly. She didn't want to send Hanna at all.

"Can't you go with me? I don't want to go by myself. I'm scared."

"I can't." she replied sadly. Oh how she wished she could. "I wish I could. But you must hurry. The doctor is only doing check ups, he said. You will be alright."

"Sich sputen! Make haste, we haven't got the time for you pigs to be slow!" barked the young doctor. He had a frown on his face, but when he saw several young children, including Hanna, he smiled once again. "Now, we shall go."

And with that, they were gone.

Rachel felt sick just thinking about it. Hanna. Alone. Hanna alone with that man. She'd heard stories. She'd seen things. You cannot live this close to a maniacal doctor without seeing and knowing things.

She laid her head back against the brick, feeling like part of her had been ripped away, and cried. It was the first time she'd allowed herself to cry since she'd gotten to the camp. Up until now, things hadn't been too terrible. But this was the point of no return. She felt, in her heart, that things would only degrade from here. How quickly, she did not know, but now she knew she was only praying for the safety of Hanna.

Her mother returned late that evening, exhausted and weak. Rachel could see her deterioration even more-so than in herself. Her poor mother. The woman who had nurtured her from the very beginning, now being worked so hard, harder than anyone should ever have to work.

And for what? A meager slice of bread and ration of soup.

She explained to her mother what had happened, and they both cried together, longing for Hanna. The six year old had become the center of their world. She was the sun to them, the brightness pulling them out of the dark every morning.

Rachel didn't sleep that night. She stayed awake, listening to the sound of hundreds of bodies breathing. It was nearly silent. She listened as the wind blew outside the barrack. Oh how she longed to be out there, in the fresh air, the cool wind sweeping casually around her exhausted figure.

She had no dreams. She never had dreams anymore. Her nights were filled with sleep, or no sleep. Nothing in between. She was too tired for dreams. Or perhaps she was too sad. Had the Nazis taken that ability away from her as well? The ability to dream of a place far away from here?

She dreamed awake. Rachel dreamed of a world where she could be free of tyranny. She would marry Finn and sing all day. She'd be treated equal. Perhaps that could happen someday? If she survived this hell, she'd make it happen.

Rachel sighed, and a little while later, she glanced out the dirty glass panes of the window to see the pale blue sky gradually gaining some light. That meant morning, which meant roll call.

The barracks became alive with voices and movement at the sound of the horn for roll call.

After nearly an hour standing in the chilly morning air, Rachel and her mother had breakfast. The poor excuse for nutrition. But she downed it anyhow, not caring that it wasn't even enough to scrape by.

She was alone as she trudged along to the Kommandant's house. The landscaper, Josef, had not shown up to work. She wondered for a second, then put her mind off of that. She didn't want to think about where he might be.

Rachel sighed as she entered the house and got to work, scrubbing the wooden floors carefully. After the floors came every window in the house, including upstairs.

She slowly walked up the dark cherry wood stairs, admiring the pictures in the frames hanging along the walls. Each room of the second floor was just as wonderfully beautiful as the last. The children had toys galore. Warm beds. Books. Music. Everything Hanna did not have. She scrubbed their windows clean of fingerprints. It was insane how these children lived so luxuriously while less than a kilometer away, children of the same age were suffering.

But Rachel was not angry at the children. It wasn't their fault.

She finished the windows, quite proud of herself, when she heard footsteps behind her. She turned around to see Anna, and smiled a little.

"Oh, hi there Rachel." Anna said, grabbing an apple from the kitchen counter. "Where's Hanna?"

"Hanna's...with the doctor today. She's getting a checkup." Rachel looked down at her feet, her dirty shoes.

"What sort of checkup? She's sick? God, she's probably brought those germs here to me. Who knows what I'll catch."

"No, she isn't sick. Just needed a checkup is all." Rachel looked back up at Anna. "I should really get back to cleaning. It's almost time for me to leave, anyhow."

"Fine then. I've got things I should be doing as well. It was nice talking to you, Rachel. Goodbye now." she said, scurrying off up the stairs.

Rachel got back to work, hoping that by the time she finished and returned to camp, Hanna would be safe in the barrack waiting for her.

So she mopped the kitchen, did the dishes, dusted the whole house, and finally she had finished for the day. Rachel walked back to the camp quickly, skipping dinner to run into the barracks and see if Hanna was there. Of course, she wasn't.

Reluctantly, Rachel received her dinner. Though it didn't feel right to eat without Hanna. She missed the little girl dearly. Who knows what that man had done to her? She'd been in there nearly a day, and Rachel hated it.

Once she was through with her food, she retreated to the barracks, laying down on the bed of straw for a while. She needed to clear her head, but that was quite hard to do here. There was an awful lot of time to simply think. That could drive a person insane, she thought.

She resorted to thinking about Finn. What was he doing at the moment? Was he thinking of her? Perhaps. But he probably wasn't. Rachel was sure she wasn't number one on his priority list. She was just some stupid girl he'd written. Surely he had another girl, one he liked more and intended to marry. She felt sad about this. When she was sixteen, Rachel had decided that she loved Finn. She wanted to marry him. Their constant letter mailing had her falling deeply in love with this boy, and she'd never even met him in person. It was strange, really, but true.

After a long while of laying there, thinking of Finn, Rachel felt the bunk move. And in climbed Hanna. Rachel shot upright, taking Hanna into her arms tightly.

"Oh, I missed you. Hanna, I missed you so much. Are you alright?" she asked, pulling out of the hug for a second to inspect the child. She appeared to be alright, except for one thing. Her eye was slightly red.

"I'm okay. B-But I got sent back here."

"Why? What happened to your eye, Hanna? What did he do to you?"

"L-Last night when I left here, he took us to the medical block. We were all allowed inside and he gave us food and candy and each of us got a bed to sleep in. It was so nice at first, Rachel. B-But then, he took us back to his medical room, one by one. I heard him say to his assistant that he was trying to change our eye colors by giving us shots. That made me scared, Rachel. But he tied us down.. He did it to everyone, and did more things to other children. I only got the one shot, and that's why my eye is red."

She opened her eye a little more, and Rachel's eyes widened at the sight of her eye. It was discolored and odd-looking. Beneath her eye was a bruise from the several shots she'd received. Rachel could tell she had been in pain. She only wished she could kill the man who had done this to her.

"I cannot see well out of this eye any longer. It doesn't work well." She told Rachel, frowning and pointing to her injured eye.

"Hanna, you're safe now, okay? You're alright." She said, hugging the girl close to her body. "I won't let anyone hurt you anymore. I promise."

And so they laid like that for the night. And for the second night in a row, Rachel didn't sleep at all. She stayed awake and watched Hanna sleep, determined to protect the girl.

* * *

**{Please Review! The more you review, the more likely I am to update faster. As long as they are legitimate reviews.. :)}**


	5. AUTHOR'S NOTE

**Hey, one other thing.. I'm going to try and make the chapters longer, it's just I am usually in a crunch for time.. I promise to make the next one extra long for all of you lovelies. Thanks again for reading!**


	6. Chapter 5

IDA Chapter 5

Rachel's back hurt. No, it _ached. _She kicked the dirt road with her shoe as she walked along the path. Her hand rested on her lower back. It didn't relieve the pain much. Her bones protruded from her body like bird beaks in a cloth bag. Her skin was thin and frail, but she steadily moved on.

Hanna was her main concern. Hanna and her thin, five year old body. Hanna and her dirty hair. Hanna and her discolored eye. If Rachel could, she'd find the man who did it to her and kill him. She would not hesitate for a second.

But instead, she was there, in the forrest. She walked along the dirt path, Hanna at her side, trying to ignore the painful aches in her back.

She pushed open the rusty, iron gate to the courtyard of the Kommandant's home. The blonde guard who stood outside the door was in his usual place. He glanced in Rachel and Hanna's direction, giving them a stern look and a slight nod as he opened the door for them.

Immediately, Hanna got to work on polishing the silver. She'd missed a while of doing it, so it had collected a bit of dust.

Rachel cleaned the dishes, her hands scrubbing each one clean. Next, her pink fingers dried each one with a soft cloth. She put them away safely in the cabinets, going through the motions of her daily routine. She heard soft footsteps in the kitchen and glanced up when she heard Anne's voice.

"Hanna's back today." She said, sounding slightly happy. The girl walked into the kitchen and leaned against the countertop. Her golden blonde hair was braided, as usual, and was tied off with red ribbons. She wore a beautiful light blue dress and it seemed as though she had on a pair of brand new, shiny black shoes.

"Well don't you look nice, Anne." Rachel commented, taking in her full outfit.

Anne nodded slightly. "Mother and I went to town yesterday. Klaus is off at grandmother's for a week. He's been absolutely awful these past few days so mother and father sent him away. And I was the oldest, so mother took me to buy some things." She told them happily, smiling and spinning around.

Hanna smiled at Anne, admiring her new clothes. "You look very pretty." She added quietly. Rachel knew that Hanna did not quite understand the situation. She did not understand why she was frowned upon.

"Why thank you Hanna." Anne told her, smiling a little. Anne was iffy in personality. She was often rude to Hanna and Rachel. However, there were times when she was nice. Particularly when she was lonely. "My mother is out with my siblings and father is at work. Would you want to come up to my room and see my things?"

"Anne, I really don't think-" Rachel began, wary of what would happen if they got caught.

Anne shook her head, stopping her. "We won't get caught. No one will be home for at least an hour. And the guard outside, he's not supposed to come in."

She turned to leave the kitchen, expecting them to follow. Rachel figured she could make herself useful cleaning upstairs also, so she and Hanna followed Anne.

They followed her up the stairs, all the while admiring each tiny detail the home had to offer. It was eerily similar to Rachel's old home, and she got shivers just thinking of it. With each step of her foot onto the dark wooden stairs, memories flooded her mind. Of her mother. Her father. Being a child in that home was magical. It was magnificently large, like this one. It created the coziest of atmospheres in winter, like this one.

At the thought of past winters, Rachel glanced out a window to her left, smiling a little as she realized that a light snow was falling. Winter always made her happiest. Summer was much too hot and sticky. But winter...winter.

She sighed. They'd been here since early summer...That long? It seemed like they'd only arrived yesterday. But, when one is stuck doing the same monotonous task endlessly, one tends to let time slip.

The three girls reached the top of the stairs and Rachel watched Hanna's face. The little girl was in awe, and possibly a bit jealous.

Anne walked along the hallway at the top of the stairs and stopped at the third door on the left. She pushed it open quietly and stepped inside, the heels of her brand new shoes clicking gently on the floor.

Her room was pristine. The walls were painted pale blue, and were nearly covered in photographs and posters. The posters were mainly the same things Rachel had always seen, advocating the Aryan race. They told lies. She saw several posters with hideous pictures of "Die Juden", Jewish people, on them. Rachel had never been more shocked. Sure, she'd seen the posters. But never had she known how proactive the Nazis were at getting _children_ to believe it.

"Can I tell you a secret, Rachel?" Anne asked, closing the door quietly.

Rachel stood still, not wanting to disturb anything in the perfect room. "Of course."

"Is it bad for me to say that I do not believe the things that are said about Jews?" She asked, a frown forming on her forhead.

"Of course not." Rachel told her, letting out a small sigh. "It's wonderful that you are such a smart girl. But...I would not advise telling your parents. They would be very upset."

"It's just, I've never seen a Jew do anything wrong. I'd never even met a Jew until I met you and Hanna." Anne said, sitting on the edge of her bed.

Rachel was shocked. How was it that a simple 10 year old girl knew better than the whole country of Germany? "You are very brave to say that. And you're right."

Meanwhile, Hanna was simply in awe. The five year old was wide eyed, looking around at all of the dolls in the room. There had to have been at least 15 fine, porcelain dolls in finer clothes than Hanna had ever seen. "Your dolls are so pretty." She said, a smile on her face.

"Maybe someday I can give you one. They really are very nice. Father imported them from Paris. Don't you think they all look like me?" She asked, leaning down next to one and smiling. Hanna smiled and nodded a little. That's when Anne noticed her eye.

"What happened to her eye?" She asked, looking up at Rachel. Hanna's eye was the usual chocolate brown, with a large blue splotch across the iris.

Hanna frowned and covered it with her hand, shaking her head. "I'm not allowed to say."

Anne frowned a little. "Whatever it is, I had better not catch it." She said, turning away from Hanna.

Rachel looked out of her window. It was strange, seeing the sight before her. Mostly, she saw forest. There was nothing in sight. But Rachel could swear she could see part of the smoke stack far off in the distance.

After a while, Hanna and Rachel returned downstairs to finish their cleaning. As the sun set and Anne's family returned to their cozy home, enjoying the company of one another and the warmth the fire provided.

She tried not to feel jealous as she walked back to the camp, Hanna's small hand in hers.

At dinner, Rachel did as she usually did. She saved a small portion of her food to both Hanna and her mother. People had told her not to do it. They said she was killing herself. They told her Hanna and her mother would die anyway. But Rachel refused to believe it.

After dinner, Rachel slowly walked through the light snowfall with Hanna in her arms. The thin clothes they were given did nothing to protect them from the elements and Rachel shivered as she trudged through the cold winter wind. It was probably mid November.

Sighing, she entered their barrack and carefully placed Hanna on the top bunk. Rachel hoisted herself up beside the small girl and slumped against the wooden planks, her head resting in the straw.

"Hanna." Rachel said quietly to the child. The child who saw everything. The child who knew pain.

Rachel placed her hand on Hanna's shoulder, just looking at her. "I will always protect you, Hanna. I won't ever let anyone hurt you again." She said, tears running slowly across her cheek and down her nose, dropping silently into the straw. All the while she thought of Hanna's eye. The pain that she must have felt. Rachel felt terribly guilty, but how was she to stop it?

"I love you Rachel." Hanna told her meekly. "I feel safe with you."

"I love you so much, Hanna. And I know your mother loves you too. She's smiling at you from heaven. And I promise, after this is over, you are going to come with me to America." She told her, smiling because she was thinking about Finn. "And I'll teach you to sing and we'll be happy."

Rachel sighed, wondering about Finn for the first time in a while. Her heart hurt when she thought of him. "There's this boy over there. His name is Finn. And he will love you so much, Hanna. He is my very best friend in the world." Rachel told her, practically beaming at the thought of him.

And half a world away, Finn was thinking of Rachel.

Finn sat on his bed, looking at his suitcase on the ground. His house was quiet because his father had not yet gotten home from work and his mother was in the garden. He sat on his bed and looked around his room. It still looked lived in, like his twelve year old self was still in here somewhere. A baseball mitt lay on the floor in the corner, and in the other corner, a ball sat lonely.

He couldn't believe today was the day he left for basic training. It was weird, thinking about growing up and what not. Truthfully, he never thought the day would actually come.

Then again, he couldn't be happier that it _had_ come. He wondered about the girl he loved, so far away in a country that despises her very existence. It's strange, really, how one group of people could hate another group of people that much. And they're going on what? A bunch of lies made up by the government. _Just all too strange, _he thought.

Finn stood up and stretched his arms out. He'd have to be leaving soon to catch the Greyhound bus to Ft. Benning, Georgia.

You could say that Finn was a little scared. Yes, on the inside he was terrified. On the outside, he was strong. But inside of him, his heart hurt. It ached for Rachel. He needed to know that she was okay, that she was even a_live._

Sighing, he picked up the worn, leather suitcase and headed downstairs, saying goodbye to childhood, and greeting adulthood.

During the night, she mostly listened to the sounds of the sleeping people. She hardly slept anymore. For hours she'd listen to the hundreds of bodies, breathing. In, out, in, out. She watched in the moonlight as Hanna's chest rose and fell at a gentle pace.

Her mother wheezed quietly. She was getting weaker by the day, though Rachel refused to believe it. She denied any kind of sickness. If anyone in the camps got sick, they'd go to the infirmary. And they'd never come back.

She frowned slightly as she thought about it. Her mother looked peaceful in her sleep, beautiful even. She remembered all the times when she was young that her mother would sing to her. Her voice was as pure as gold and simply magnificent. She used to work as a singer in a wonderful dinner restaurant before Rachel was born. And Rachel had worked as a singer in a bar to earn extra money for her mother and herself when hard times hit. The voices of the Berry family were truly everything that got them by at one point.

Diving back into the memories made her sad, so she just laid there, willing herself not to cry. She could not waste her energy on that.

Instead, she focused on the sounds of the barracks. Creaky boards. Wheezing. Coughing. Breathing. It was alive, yet so dead. Outside, no birds chirped. No bugs buzzed. Only the sound of crickets could be heard. And it was peaceful. The sounds kept her alive through the night. The thin brick walls of the barracks did nothing to block the cold from seeping in through every crevice and crack. Rachel's whole body was numbed from it. It fell over her like a stiff, icy blanket.

At the last possible moment, Rachel allowed her eyes to close and sleep to take her. She slipped off into a dream state, letting her mind wander wherever it wanted to go. Her dreams took her far away from this place of death and hatred. They took her to America, where she was free.

It was the first dream she'd had in months.

Unfortunately, her dreams were interrupted by a loud horn sounding. It signaled morning roll call, which meant it was 5 AM. She forced the sleep from her brain, letting it drain out through her ears and eyes.

She pulled herself off the bunk and helped Hanna and her mother down as well. The barracks were alive again, rustling with the sounds of the bodies that had been breathing the night before moving about in the early morning.

Morning roll call was miserable. The snow had fallen thickly during the night and covered the ground like a fleece blanket. A deep fog had set across the camp, creating a rather spooky landscape, though no one was awake enough to process the thought of it.

She stood in her usual spot, Hanna a few feet to the right of her and her mother a few feet to the left. Her feet were icicles in her shoes, numb from the cold. She glanced in her mother's direction when she heard her cough. The coughing didn't stop.

In fact, her mother hadn't stopped coughing most of the night. If she wasn't coughing, she was wheezing. This worried Rachel. Maybe they were right. Was she sick?

The head of the women's block seemed to think so.

The next few minutes passed in slow motion, it felt like. First, her mother coughed. Then, there was blood on her hand and mouth. The overseer saw her and frowned. And with a simple point, her mother was out of the line and at the front of a newly formed line. The overseer began pointing to anyone she deemed unhealthy enough to be forced to leave the camp. By the time she'd finished, nearly one quarter of the women were in the new line. They were all sick. You could see it on their faces. They could no longer work, so they were of no use anymore.

Rachel's chest felt tight and she shook her head slightly. Her mother gave her a look of sadness, but held her finger to her lips. And she mouthed a last _I love you_, before marching off with the others to an unknown destination. Rachel sobbed inside her body. On the outside, she was strong. But the inside of her felt like lava. It was burning and churning and she couldn't stop it. Tears stung her eyes and eventually rolled down her cheeks. The white, winter winds whipped at her face, freezing the tears.

_No, no, _she thought, wondering what had just happened. She felt like just giving up altogether. Letting them take her to the gas chambers would be better than this feeling. And as she watched her mother disappear into the distance, she realized the only thing she had left was Hanna. Her Hanna, whom she'd sworn to protect.


	7. Chapter 6

**Hello Everyone.. Long time no write, huh? I have had the worst writer's block for this story... Ugh. I actually started this chapter at Christmastime. Is that sad? I meant for it to be updated so much sooner, but I never had time and energy! But finally, here it is.. Not as long as I'd hoped for, but it's okay..**

**WARNING: This chapter has Graphic Subject matter for language and just other things. Not sexual things, just graphic language and attitudes of characters..**

* * *

Rachel wasn't sure what day it was when she woke up, but she knew it was cold and snowy. She knew it had been nearly a month since her mother was taken, and she knew it had been the worst month of her life.

Because she knew what had happened to her mother. There was no doubting it.

She figured it was some day in December, maybe even Christmas. The thought of that didn't make her any happier, though. It did not lift her spirit.

But Hanna seemed to like it. Upon hearing the news about what day it was, Hanna's face lit up. She stood cheerily through roll call, and as they stood in line for breakfast, Hanna bounced up and down. It was more energy in the five year old than Rachel had seen in months. "Hanna.." she asked as they trudged through the snowy path to the Kommandant's house, "What's got you all worked up this morning?""It's Christmas, Rachel! But guess what else..." She said, smiling up at Rachel with her pink nose and flushed cheeks.

"What is it?" Rachel asked, smiling back down at Hanna. Her good mood had, in turn, inadvertently put Rachel in a good mood as well.

"Well, Christmas is also my birthday. I'm six today." Hanna told her, clapping her hands together.

Rachel smiled widely, "Really? You're such a big girl, Hanna." Hanna nodded and stopped just inside the gate, her smile fading a bit. "But my mother is not here this year. She went into the woods and never came out. Why hasn't she come for me, Rachel? You told me she was in heave, but why? What happened?" she asked, a frown on her forehead.

Rachel had always dreaded the day that Hanna would ask this. "Hanna," she said quietly, kneeling down on her knee. "That day, when your mother was taken in to the woods...she was killed by the Nazis. They shot her. But you see, she wasn't in any pain when she died. And I know that she knew you'd be safe. She loved you very much." Hanna looked down to the ground, one tear falling from her eye. "I just want to go home, I don't like living here."

"I know you don't. We'll be out soon, alright? Let's just make your birthday happy, okay?" She said, smiling as she stood up. "Come on, we can't be late."

Inside, Rachel was grateful for the warmth. Her feet were frozen little blocks of ice, but they thawed gradually as she helped Hanna scrub the silver and crystal for the Kommandant's annual Christmas banquet. All of the SS Guards from the Camps were invited, and a select few of the prisoners would be chosen to staff the whole affair. Pouring wine, serving food, and what not. Rachel, Hanna, and a man called David. They, out of everyone in the camps, had been chosen to help with the dinner. Rachel suspected it was because of the fact that they helped tend to the house daily. David had replaced Josef as the groundskeeper after Josef had fallen ill and mysteriously disappeared.

This meant that the three of them had to help immensely before the banquet, polishing silver and crystal and cleaning every part of the house. It also meant that they had to look slightly more presentable, which meant showers and getting clean, after months of going without.

And as she stood around the counter, her fingers rubbed raw by the intensity of her scrubbing, she smiled at Hanna. "You know what this means, right?" Hanna shook her head slightly. "No, what?"

"We may get to eat whatever is leftover. You may have a birthday and a Christmas feast, yet, Hanna." Rachel told her, smiling. "And later tonight, I might, _might, _sing for you."

The little girl smiled wide and set a crystal goblet on the counter. "Oh would you!? Rachel, please sing for me later!"

"Maybe, if we get through this banquet tonight without a scratch. I'll sing for everyone later tonight." Rachel smiled down at Hanna.

They continued polishing and shining until all of the platters and crystal glasses were shining and their hands were red and raw. Hanna hummed a little while she worked on putting away the silver in the cabinet. Neither noticed when Anne slipped into the kitchen. "So tonight's the big Christmas banquet," piped Anne, leaning against the countertop, "You two are working, I suppose."

Hanna nodded and smiled at her. "Today is my birthday, Anne."

"Really now? How lucky you are to have a birthday on Christ's day." Anne told her, watching them as the girls scrubbed away at the finery. "What are you hoping to receive from Saint Nicholas tonight?"

The younger girl looked up at Anne and thought for a second. "I lost my special bear a while back...I hope for Saint Nicholas to give me a _new_ bear."

Rachel grimly looked down as she cleaned, not having the heart at all to tell Hanna that Saint Nicholas would not be bringing her anything tonight. If anything, they'd get the scraps from tonight's banquet and that would be that.

Anne bit her lip gently and nodded, "Well, you shan't really expect anything, Hanna. I'm not sure Saint Nicholas visits children where you are...at."

Hanna's forehead instantly turned to a frown and she looked down, silently continuing her work. The small girl refused to allow any tears to escape her eyes, because she had become stronger in the camp. Her childhood and innocence was leaving her and she was becoming hardened, less vulnerable to the outside world.

"However, I do have something that might cheer you up." Anne said, scampering upstairs quickly. Rachel quickly hugged Hanna tightly and kissed her forehead, assuring her that Christmas would not be ruined for them.

Anne returned, holding something behind her back. With a wide grin on her face, the young girl pulled from behind her back a wonderful mink teddy bear the color of dark chocolate. "I've had this old thing for ages. I don't play with him much anymore."

Hanna's eyes widened as she looked upon the bear, taking in the full beauty of it. Her hand reached out as if instinctively to touch the soft fur, and when she did, a small smile graced her face.

"You can have him." Anne told her, thrusting the teddy to the young girl. "Although, I think it would be best if we kept him here for a while until I can devise a plan to tell my parents that I've lost the bear. He's still very precious to me, but I think you should have him."

"Oh, Anne.." Rachel murmured, setting a crystal goblet down on the counter to touch the bear as well, "It's so soft and beautiful. You are such a kind girl."

"I know." Anne said, grinning.

Just then, a heavy thud of boots on the wooden floor alerted the three girls that the Kommandant was inside. Rachel knew the sound of his feet on the floor because he was a rather heavyset man, and his walk was much louder and slower than the young guard who often waited outside.

"What is this? What are you doing?" He asked angrily, glaring at the three of them. "Annegret, get away from the pigs. Take your bear back upstairs and don't let them touch it ever again, do you understand? You must get ready for this evening now. Go on, upstairs." He said, shooing her along. He turned his heavy gaze to Rachel and glared down at her, his eyes cutting through her and burning holes into her skin. "And what do you think you are doing, talking to my daughter? You think you are worthy of that, you scum?"

Rachel simply shook her head, looking down. She couldn't meet his gaze. She would freeze, fall on the floor, die. "No..N-No sir."

"I have given you the best jobs in the entire camp, you two. Do you even know how much I do for you, you filthy pigs? You are not worthy of being in my house, and certainly not worthy of talking to my daughter and dirtying her! Now, I have warned you. If I ever catch you again, you can say goodbye to this job and your life. I shall see personally to it that you are hung in front of the whole camp. Both of you. Now, get your asses to the camp and clean your filth off before you infect my entire family with your germs."

Hanna and Rachel nodded in unison and set the silver and crystal back in the cabinets before walking off. Only, Rachel was stopped by the Kommandant's large hand gripping her dress from behind. "SS Officer Schmidt wants to speak with you. Go now, let the child walk back alone."

Rachel simply nodded, although she would rather die than let Hanna be in that camp alone again. The discoloration of her left eye was a constant and painful reminder of what had happened the last time she let her go alone.

Unfortunately, with the Kommandant of the camp watching, Rachel had to send Hanna on her own. Strictly, she told the young girl to stay in the barracks and not to leave for any reason at all. The girl nodded and solemnly walked back to the camp, kicking the dirt up with her shoes along the way.

Rachel stood in front of the blonde guard outside the house of the Kommandant and stared up at his cold eyes. "Yes?" She asked quietly, her hands clasped behind her back.

"I have been watching you every day since you got here. You and the girl are starving. I would like to strike a compromise."

Rachel frowned slightly, not quite understanding what an SS Officer might want from her. "Continue."

"You have something that I am in need of. A service that only a woman could offer a man. And you see, I am not married and we are not in a city with many women.."

"You are asking me to be your...whore? Your prostitute? I won't do it!" She told him, shaking her head vehemently, frowning deeply.

Officer Schmidt wasted no time in grabbing her arm tight enough to leave bruises, shaking her slightly. "You will do as I say. And if you want extra food rations, you will not complain. I expect you to be at Block Eight daily at nine pm. Tell no one where you are going of I shall have you executed. I will let the cook know to give you extra."

"For Hanna as well. Please, for Hanna also."

"Fine. She will die soon anyhow. Children in the camp never last. Not ever." He said, shaking his head. "I don't expect you to tell anyone of our compromise, and I will not expect us to talk in any other way. You are simply there for my use and my pleasure."

Rachel nodded, looking down. This was the moment she knew she'd reached her lowest. She'd give her body away for food to save them. Humiliation covered her face, but she would stay strong enough for Hanna. Hanna, with her dark brown hair and bright green eyes.

"Get back to camp. And be back here at the house at 5 sharp, no later or you'll be going without a meal tonight. You really have no idea how lucky you to pigs are, compared to what the rest of the camp has."

"Thank you Officer Schmidt, sir." She told him quietly before quickly hurrying down the path leading to the camp. The wind whipped her from behind, tearing through the thin dress she wore, chilling her to the bone. She'd lost a good amount of weight since she'd arrived nearly seven months ago.

Upon arrival in the barracks, Rachel was relieved to see Hanna resting peacefully on their bunk, huddled in a corner of the wooden slats, trying to escape the wind seeping through the cracks in the poorly built brick building.

And so they washed their faces with the nearly frozen water dripping from the spout outside the food block. Rachel gently wiped Hanna's face with a damp portion of the skirt of her dress, cleaning off months of grime and dirt. Hanna did the same for her, and they attempted to comb one another's hair. Finally, they deemed themselves worthy and decent looking enough to go back to the Kommandant's house.

They held hands as they walked along the snowy path, not even caring that their feet were frozen and their noses pink. The sky was dark and filled with stars of all kinds, allowing for the most magnificent of views.

Once inside the warmth of the house, Rachel and Hanna were put straight to work, bringing the food out to the nearly 12 guests. Hanna filled each adult goblet with a deep red wine, and served milk to Anne and her siblings. While they ate, Hanna and Rachel stood quietly in the kitchen, awaiting the task of serving the next course.

It seemed to take forever, she thought. Filling and refilling each glass. Hanna reached slowly for the empty glass of the blonde guard, Officer Schmidt, and accidentally knocked it over. The red wine seeped into the pure white tablecloth and dripped silently onto his pants. She'd never seen an angrier man in her life. He stood and shook her by her shoulders, causing her head to fling back and forth like a rag doll's would.

"You _stupid_ Jew! Look what you've done now!" He yelled, slapping her hard across the face. Rachel was stunned, and nearly ran to stop him. She knew if she did, however, that there would be consequences for the both of them if she did. So she held all of her anger inside of her, only allowing a small tear to slide down her cheek. And the terrible thing was, no one stopped him. Not one person at that table of twelve. Anne simply looked down, and Rachel knew in her heart that she wished she could stop him as well.

After one more painful slap to the cheek, he let her go and stood up to let her clean the table and refill his glass. Hanna slowly retreated to the kitchen and hugged Rachel tightly around the waist. She could see a clearly defined handprint on Hanna's face, which infuriated her. "It's okay, Hanna. Just stay strong, my baby. We must carry on, okay?" Rachel told her, planting a tiny kiss on Hanna's forehead.

After a while, the children were sent to bed and all who remained were the adults, drinking their brandy and discussing affairs of the camp and the goings on in different places throughout Germany.

That's when they were allowed to eat whatever was leftover, she and Hanna and David, the groundskeeper.

Gratefully, they stuffed their bellies full of the Christmas meal, and Rachel realized it was the first time since early July that she'd been full.

They were sent on their way back to the camp and Rachel held Hanna's hand once again as they trudged through the snow. She wondered what Finn was doing on this Christmas night. Was he with his family? With his mother and father? Did he have siblings? She smiled at the thought of seeing him someday. Maybe she'd marry him, if she ever got out of the camp.

Hanna tugged at Rachel's dress when they lay on the wooden slats and straw that night, the barracks slowly getting quieter.

"You promised me you'd sing for me..For all of us." Hanna told her, sitting up a little.

"I suppose I did." She said, sighing. Rachel sat up in the bunk and cleared her throat.

**_Silent Night_**

**_English:_**

_Silent night, holy night_

_All is calm all is bright_

_'Round yon virgin Mother and Child_

_Holy infant so tender and mild_

_Sleep in heavenly peace_

_Sleep in heavenly peace_

_Silent night, holy night, _

_Shepherds quake at the sight. _

_Glories stream from heaven afar, _

_Heav'nly hosts sing Alleluia; _

_Christ the Savior is born_

_Christ the Savior is born_

_Silent night, holy night, _

_Son of God, love's pure light. _

_Radiant beams from Thy holy face, _

_With the dawn of redeeming grace, _

_Jesus, Lord, at Thy birth_

_Jesus, Lord, at Thy birth_

**_German:_**

_Stille Nacht, heilige Nacht, _

_Alles schläft; einsam wacht_

_Nur das traute hochheilige Paar. _

_Holder Knabe im lockigen Haar, _

_Schlaf in himmlischer Ruh! _

_Schlaf in himmlischer Ruh! _

_Stille Nacht, heilige Nacht, _

_Hirten erst kundgemacht_

_Durch der Engel Halleluja, _

_Tönt es laut von fern und nah: _

_Christ, der Retter ist da! _

_Christ, der Retter ist da! _

_Stille Nacht, heilige Nacht, _

_Gottes Sohn, o wie lacht_

_Lieb' aus deinem göttlichen Mund_

_, Da uns schlägt die rettende Stund'. _

_Christ, in deiner Geburt! _

_Christ, in deiner Geburt!_

* * *

**Thanks for reading! Any suggestions and comments are always welcome, so please REVIEW! PLEASE!**


	8. Chapter 7

**Hey all. So, I realized just after I posted that last chapter that Silent Night is a Christian song, and Rachel is obviously Jewish.. Meh, whatever. Mistake on my behalf, but it's still a beautiful song!**

**Also, I know many many many of you are just wanting Finn to show up already, but I don't want to rush this story because I really do love it. :) Also, liberation for almost all of the camps did not happen until 1945, and remember the current year is 1941 (well, now it's 1942 in this chapter). But I will give you guys a little something for the time being.**

**Another point is the prostitution. It was extremely common during this time for women to be used by the SS and, in fact, other prisoners in a 'special block' of the camp. I know y'all are upset by it, but it won't last for long.**

**Enjoy this chapter and Review please!**

* * *

Each time it happened she left that block feeling miserable about herself. She was a puppet Rachel, not really inside her own body. Her mind had left her to be happier elsewhere. She was a shell of her former self, ashamed to have stooped to such low levels. But she had to because that was keeping her and Hanna alive.

Melted snow froze her feet as it seeped through the thin layers of her shoes, if they could really be called shoes. It was nearly February now, and the whole camp felt it. Snowfall was daily, the work harder, and the rations lighter. The extras she had been promised by Officer Schmidt were slim, but still something.

Wind whipped at her face as she stepped over the icy puddles and piles of snow to make her way to her barracks. The camp was nearly silent and only a few souls were out in the cold. But she was fooling herself, because it was cold inside the barracks too. There was no luxury of fireplaces, no heating element, not even blankets in the camp for the prisoners. But still, when she stepped inside, it was warmer than outside simply from the sheer amount of body heat provided by the innumerable amount of women in the barrack.

"Where have you been, Rachel? It's cold out there. Don't know know you'll get sick?" An older lady by the name of Helena asked her.

"I've just been-" she began when she was cut off by another woman, Sarah.

"She's just been out sleeping with an Officer, just like that whore Greta who did it before her. Before she was sent to the gas chambers. But now you've replaced him, haven't you, Rachel? You've been sleeping with him to get extra food!" Sarah shouted at her, clearly miffed by the fact that Rachel earned a meager amount more than the other woman.

"It's not much, really, it's all for Hanna." She said, looking down in embarrassment.

"_Tsk, tsk. _What would your mother say about you becoming a whore, Rachel? God knows what kind of diseases you have picked up from him." Sarah told her mockingly. Rachel hoped Hanna was not awake, for she did not want the young girl to hear about what she'd done. "How many times has it happened? And how much extra food are you getting?"

"It's happened three times per week since Christmas. And the food is not much, I swear. It's barely more than what we originally got."

"Still more. You think you're better than all of us because you work up in the house, cleaning all day. We're stuck out there in the quarry doing labor and you think you deserve more than us? Nonsense, whore." She spat, frowning at Rachel.

Helena put her hand on Sarah's back to stop her and stood. "We all do what we must do to stay alive, Sarah."

Sarah, grumbling, laid down on her portion of the straw on the wooden bunk and Rachel exhaustedly climbed to the top tier where she and Hanna shared theirs. Luckily, the small girl was out like a light, her nose whistling slightly with each breath she sucked in and released.

Rachel held her close and rested her tired head on the wooden boards, not welcoming sleep. She knew she should, but there was no way she could with all that was on her mind. She shivered and let goose bumps prick up all over her body and when her eyes were filled with tears, she finally allowed sleep to take her.

* * *

-FINN POV-

He was home on two weeks leave before being shipped off to California. He didn't know why, but he never felt right anymore. He guessed that it probably had something to do with Rachel, because he hadn't heard anything from her in nearly eight months. And that worried him.

His house was warm and the neighborhood snowy. All the boys who had been at basic training returned home to open arms and warm apple pies, but Finn just didn't feel _right_ enough to enjoy any of it. He hadn't been home for Christmas, so his mother was making up for that by cooking every chance she got, which he didn't mind, but he didn't enjoy like he used to either.

And his father was constantly trying to talk about the war with him and they listened to the radio together to hopefully hear news about it coming to a close, but he knew that wouldn't be the case until the Americans got over there. All they really knew that Germany was going batshit crazy and taking over countries left and right.

He sat on the couch with one leg crossed over the other, reading a newspaper. It was kind of a picture perfect image of his father when Finn was little, because he'd wake up each Saturday and there he'd be, no doubt, reading the paper with his leg crossed just like that. And he and Finn would listen to the cartoon on the radio and look at the funny comics in the paper before Finn would race outside to join his buddies on his bike and they'd ride all through the town for the whole day. He missed childhood.

Sighing, he set the paper down and paced around the house. His mother was out at the store, picking up groceries, and his father was due for a trim at the barber's. So he was alone, and his worrying had never been greater than it was then. Finn only needed to know that she was okay, that she was still alive and well and happy. His worry for her was constant, because he just never felt _right_ inside, like this invisible rope inside of him was tugging.

* * *

-Rachel POV-

Roll call had been more bearable that day than any previous days that winter. Most of the snow was melted by now, so it was much easier to walk. And work had been easier as well, just cleaning and polishing as usual. Anne hadn't spoken to them at all, for fear of getting in trouble again. She hadn't spoken to them at all since Christmas, which was nearly five weeks ago.

At the end of the day, they returned to camp to collect their food, and indeed they received slightly more than usual, which excited Hanna to no end. They sat in their usual place to eat it; a large rock just near the fence of the camp. It was far enough in the distance that they wouldn't be caught unless a guard himself walked to the edge. They made sure not to touch the wire though, because electricity coursed through it, and she was sure it would kill her if she touched it.

After their meager dinner, it was nearly time for her to go again.

Hanna spoke up as they sat inside the barracks, alone save for one person asleep. "Rachel, where do you go every night?"

She bit her lip not wanting to lie to the child, but she surely couldn't tell the truth. "Well, I just go and do a bit of work for a gentleman who needs my help. That's how we've been getting extra food, because I'm doing some work on the side."

"Oh." She said quietly and looked down. "Thank you, Rachel."

Rachel hugged the small girl close to her chest and kissed her cheek gently. "I will be back later."

She climbed down from their bunk and exited the barrack, slowly making her way to the special block where Officer Schmidt would be waiting.

Inside the building, it was warm and smelled musty, like dirt and old sweat. She knew where to go; up the stairs, third door on the right. It was a heavy wooden door, and the floors were wooden as well, creaking and groaning with each step she took. Quietly, she entered the room and saw him sitting upon the bed in only his undergarments. The room was dark except for one small oil lamp beside the bed. And the bed was scratchy and not warm at all, but it was softer than wooden boards for sure.

When it was all over and Officer Schmidt left the room, she lay in bed feeling used and wasted, which is exactly what she was. What had her life come to? She pulled the itchy blanket close to her body and lay for nearly fifteen minutes before sitting up and slowly pulling her clothes back on. Oh, what she wouldn't give to take that blanket back to Hanna. But she couldn't. This was _his_ room, she remembered.

Curiously, she took in the surroundings. There was a chest of drawers on one wall, rickety and nearly broken down. A cracked mirror sat atop it and she stood in front of it, meeting the gaze of the dead girl staring back at her. The girl's eyes were sunken in and dark, colder than they used to be. Her neck protruded from her dress like a stick, and her cheeks were sunken in and bones protruded from her face awkwardly. She couldn't even think about what her body looked like. Her arms, she saw clearly. They were think rods, and her shoulderblades jutted out from her back like a crow's beak.

No, she could not look any more. It was too much. It was all just too much. And her stomach hurt, along with her head, and her body _ached_ with every movement she made.

Then she spotted something. A few pencils lying on a writing desk in the corner of the room. A thick stack of paper sat beside them, untouched and pure white. Her fingers grazed the smooth sheet on top and she had a sudden idea. She could send a letter to Finn, or she could try at least.

Quickly, she snatched one sheet of paper and an envelope from the stack on the desk. Rachel picked one of the pencils from the group on the desk and stuffed it down her dress safely in her undershirt. She crossed her arms over her chest, ensuring that they would not move, and marched out of the special block, ignoring the snowflakes hitting her in the face. Her eyes stung with tears of happiness. Even if she couldn't send the letter, this was the closest she'd get to contacting him. Her heart swelled with joy and she really couldn't be happier.

Quietly, she slipped into the barrack, ignoring the stares and looks from the women around her. She didn't care that it smelled like rotten food and dirt, because her happiness couldn't be contained. Quickly, she climbed up to the top tier of the bunk and leaned against the wooden slats, careful not to wake a sleeping Hanna.

How good that pencil felt in her hands, she could never say. Holding it felt like she held a key to her escape. She felt strong again, powerful, and like what she was doing with Officer Schmidt was not nearly as humiliating. Carefully, she began to write.

* * *

_My dearest Finn, _

_I do not know what to say...Other than that I am alive. I am surviving for you. I cannot tell you much about where I am, because truly, I do not know myself. I am living in a camp and I have taken on the responsibility of mothering a young girl, Hanna. Her mother passed on eight months ago, before we first arrived here. My mother is gone now. I do not know where. Finn, you must help me. It is wonderful iN the camp here and fOod is plenTiful. __Please__ pay attention to the way I write this letter. Many people are __ help__ful here. I am getting by, and I cannot wait to see your face someday. I love you so much and I hope you can reach me soon because __**I**__am__ ready to see you, and I __so__ hope you are not __cold__ when you fall asleep at night. _

_I must go now because it is nearly dawn here and work begins soon. _

_All my love,_

_Rachel_

* * *

She finished the letter with a tear dripping from her eye. Hopefully he would catch onto the code she had encrypted into the letter. It had taken her nearly all night to write it, because she could not figure out what to say to him. Surely, she could not tell him right out that the camp was horrible. So she'd lain in a series of codes, such as capitalizing certain letters to spell out words, underlining certain things to create phrases, and bolding letters with the pencil.

She folded the paper carefully, kissing it gently. Rachel slipped it into the envelope she had snatched as well and scribed the address he had given her so long ago. She'd memorized it two summers ago.

Now, all she had to do was send it with someone to mail it to him. _Anne_. Perhaps the young eleven-year-old would know a way to send the letter off for her. She would ask tomorrow, possibly. For now, she tucked the letter safely in between the cracks of the wood, and slipped the pencil in as well, protecting them both. She lay on her back, hands clasped across her stomach, feet crossed, smiling a little at the feeling of Hanna curled up at her side.

And she did what she always did if she was awake when no one else was. She just listened to the sounds of the breathing in and out of the bodies in the barrack. The sunlight shone through the cracks and pierced the darkness, and she felt as if this place, this _hell_, would not last so long. As long as she was able to find the beauty in the world around her, no matter how little of it remained, she would be okay.

She had not lost everything, not yet anyhow. She had Hanna, she had her voice, and she had Finn. And in that moment, she knew her mother was looking down on her because the warmth in her heart was swelling and suddenly her whole body felt warm and heated, and nothing could do that in this cold. Her mother was gone, she felt it inside of her. And for the first time in a long time, she cried for her mother and didn't feel upset about crying, because it was okay again to feel emotional. It was okay to feel normal, and she realized that she did not have to constantly be strong for everyone around her, because she was only human. As often as she was told that she was subhuman, Rachel believed she was a human. She was as human as Anne, or Officer Schmidt. Realizing the beauty in the horrendous world was just a fact that she was human.

And she felt warm when she stood up for roll call and she didn't care when people called her crazy for smiling the whole way through it. The women of the barracks stared at her strangely but she just hugged Hanna close, humming quietly to herself.

* * *

**Okay, I worked so hard writing this for you guys today. :) Yay me. **

**Shorter than I would like, again, but I didn't want to ruin the ending with more stuff. I hope you liked this chapter as much as I did! But yeah, I took the idea of the tether from glee, ya know. :) **

**Reviews please!**


End file.
